with Relationship Sexpert Larry James
"Oh Yes, Touch Me There!"
Kara Oh, Guest Author
Typically, erogenous zones are thought of as those places on our bodies that arouse us during foreplay. Foreplay
assumes that which is done before -- in this case, before intercourse.
I prefer to think of foreplay as "loveplay" so that all aspects of sex are equally worthy of your attention.
Maybe you never get to intercourse. Maybe you just touch, arouse, play and then, feeling complete, hold each
other and cuddle. For most women, every element of lovemaking holds equal weight -- from the touching at dinner,
to the lovemaking, and finally the cuddling after.
The whole body can be erogenous and bring you to higher levels of arousal. How about the feathery touch of
your partner dragging their fingers slowly and softly across the inside of your arms, fingers, thighs, legs,
feet, back and buttocks? Try licking the belly and all around the yoni (Sanskrit for the woman's genital area)
without ever touching the clitoris. Do those things to your partner that you love having done to you and watch
their response. Most men tell me they have never been "made love to."
Have you ever had your toes or fingers sucked? It can be an amazing turn-on. Some men find their nipples to
be quite sensitive. Many women need to be aroused before their breasts and clitoris are touched. Loveplay gets
her ready for you to arouse and stimulate those more sexual places on her body.
Just because a man has an erection doesn't necessarily mean he wants to be grabbed right away. He may, but
even so, why not tease him? Play with the other areas of his body that are sensitive -- his thighs, testicles, and belly.
Remember that the eyes are another erogenous zone. Those looks of desire, love and passion can be quite
arousing and can go on anywhere: at a party, a dinner, or across a room.
During loveplay, listen to your partners sounds and breathing, notice how their body reacts. Those sounds
and movements can be a turn-on. When you notice your partner enjoying something, ask them during your cuddling
what they liked about what you were doing.
Discovering what our partner likes is a lovely mystery. If we're curious and willing to experiment,
the discoveries never stop.
• • •
Copyright © - Kara Oh. Reprinted with permission.
Kara Oh, is a motivational speaker, author, web site maven, advice columnist, wife, mother of grown
children and Ibu to her 7 year old grandson. In her book,
"Men Made Easy,"
Kara reveals twelve essential secrets that every woman needs to know so she can counter the odds of our 50% divorce rate.
AliveWithLove.com
• If you would like to talk
one-on-one with Larry James about relationship issues related to this article, you are invited to arrange for a
private coaching session by telephone. Go to Personal Relationship Coaching
for specific details.
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