with Relationship Sexpert Larry James
Three Kinds of Sex
Happy Couples Need
Nisandeh Neta, Guest Author
Not all sex is created equal. And when it comes to lovemaking, marriages need a little variety.
The recipe for a great marriage is to have an equal balance of the three basic approaches to
lovemaking: quickies, comfort sex, and spectacular sex.
1. Quickies - Quickies
are a handy in a busy life, but they offer a lot more.
They're tailor-made for those marriages in which one partner has a higher sex-per-week requirement than the other.
And, approached with the right attitude, quickies can inject passion back into your relationship.
Bear in mind, however, that if you go too far in favor of the quickie, problems are likely to crop up.
2. Comfort Sex - It's one of the great bonuses of monogamy. Comfort sex is lovemaking that
can only be enjoyed by two people who know each other, and each other's bodies, extremely well.
This sex is loving rather than crazy-in-love. It's not about athletic skill or numbers of orgasms,
but rather about the bonds of time, experience, and intimacy you and your partner share.
But beware; too much comfort sex can get boring. If you're having mostly comfort sex, change the
circumstances. Wear something sexy, eat dinner on the floor in front of the fireplace, then make love
on the kitchen table.
3. Mind-Blowing Sex - Every once in a while, you get lucky and fall into an erotic encounter
that reminds you that you are one hot couple. Usually, it's circumstances that send sex into the "WOW"
territory: The kids are away, it's your anniversary, or you're on vacation.
Other times, mind-blowing sex is the simple result of trying something new that works. Maybe it's a
new position or a different room of the house or fulfilling each other's sexual fantasies.
In exploring and experimenting, you might discover something that really feels wonderful, and
suddenly the sex is elevated from everyday to spectacular.
But no one can have a sex life that is 100 percent earth-shattering. It would become a burden to
think of something new to do night after night, and your body would grow tired.
Find the balance between quickies, comfort sex, and spectacular sex and pretty soon, you'll realize
that variety really is the spice of a great sex life.
• • •
Copyright © - Nisandeh Neta. Reprinted with permission.
His monthly newsletter "Love and Marriage" delivers immediately usable practices that create more love, happiness, intimacy,
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• If you would like to talk
one-on-one with Larry James about relationship issues related to this article, you are invited to arrange for a
private coaching session by telephone. Go to Personal Relationship Coaching
for specific details.
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